mazbook1
Feb 27, 2010, 2:26 PM
Post #6 of 15
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Although all Spanish courses teach the Usted is the "formal" you, that isn't generally true in México, especially here in the conservative north. Usted is the RESPECTFUL form of you and should be used (at least in the north) in speaking with anyone unless they actually tell you to use tu and/or use tu when speaking to you, even when you are on a first name basis. I've been on a first name basis with my wife's parents for some time now, yet they always use Usted (or the Usted verb conjugation) with me and I certainly reciprocate when speaking with them.
One gringa, a lady who has worked here in Mazatlán for many years and speaks flawless, fluent Spanish (I'm green with envy LOL), took me to task for the advice in my little book to always use Usted or the Usted verb conjugation. A couple of months later, she bought a house in a purely Mexican working-class neighborhood. That week there was a neighborhood meeting about getting more of the dirt streets paved, which she attended. She called me right after that and apologized, saying that there were many folks that had been neighbors for 30 years and longer who still used Usted with each other.
Usted has three things to recommend it. 1. You just can't be wrong if you use it with everyone (excluding children). 2. You will always be considered more respectful than other gringos. 3. Since Usted uses the same verb conjugation as he, she and it, you have one less verb conjugation to learn at first. Also, the plural you in México is always ustedes, the respectful form, rather than the familiar vosotros that now seems to be used only in Spain.
I've only had one person tell me, "Por favor, tutéame.", since I've lived in México (nearly 13 years now), and she was from Buenos Aires.
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