How has your life changed since moving to Mexico?

I think we're in the process of "adopting" a Mexican family....or they're in the process of adopting us. Our maid and my wife are the same age and they get along so well despite the language barrier. We've met a few family members too and they're all good people. I'm quite sure that I would have shied away from this a bit in my/our old life, so we must be changing. We've got some friends in Ajijic who've lived there for seven or eight years who have talked positively about the mutual benefits of a close relationship of this kind. reply]




Ian, take it slow. Some “adoptions” work out rather well, and some becoming smothering relationships from which it’s going to be very hard to extricate yourselves.

Now I’m not trying to impute ill motivation, but you are a gringo and possessed of financial circumstances which exceed the lot of your maid and her family. And you have an employer-employee relationship with the maid. That relationship can easily become clouded when there’s too much familiarity flowing in either direction. At least for the first few years, or even the first year or so, I’d recommend keeping the relationship cordial but somewhat distant. As you learn more about the lay of the land, and your relationship and confidence in the maid develops, the opportunity for an expansion will still be there.

Obviously, you’re not Simon Legree, but you don’t need to be Santa Claus either.

There can be tremendous benefits in developing these kinds of relationships, and there can be disasters. Tread cautiously and carefully. It’s far easier to expand into a more generous mode as time goes by than to retreat. And you won’t be setting your help up for disappointed expectations.