buscardero
Jan 3, 2011, 7:38 PM
Post #1 of 11
(3427 views)
Shortcut
|
All the news of the drug wars in Mexico has created an excellent opportunity for some high quality extreme tourism. So with that in mind, I am pleased to announce the latest tour opportunity in Mazatlan, Narco Tours; a walk on the wild side. Each of these three tours would present the participants with a daily challenge and some times an extreme challenge.
The least strenuous of the tours is called Whoa Dude, Let’s Score and can be enjoyed on a leisurely afternoon. The object is for the tour group to obtain a small amount (1 to 2 ounces) of marijuana from a typical street dealer. To locate this street dealer, the group will query pulmunia drivers that subtly display a pot leaf somewhere on their taxi. After the group has scored several bags of the aromatic weed, they will proceed to the area where the North Beach fishermen hang out. Upon arrival, the group will mingle with these colorful local characters and freely pass out generous amounts of their recently acquired contraband. After a while these salty seafarers, with great smiles and slurred Spanish, will be sharing their beer and cheap tequila with the tour group. The challenge for that day will be to simply find your way back to the hotel. The survival rate for this tour is excellent.
The tour called My Sweet Drug Lord would start in one of several known narco bars and go like a scavenger hunt from there. The group would choose one member to engage the bartender and ask about purchasing a large quaintly of cocaine; this will start the ball rolling. The day and night will consist of driving through some very ethnic parts of Mazatlan and meeting thugs with automatic weapons. Whenever an amount of cocaine is presented, the group will demand a larger amount, this is when most of the travel takes place. The primary purpose is to keep moving up the chain of command until you meet a truly dangerous person. When you are finally taken to a place where you find a room stacked with hundreds of kilos, you know that you have just found a major dealer. The extreme challenge of this tour is to escape the clutches of the evil drug lord when he discovers you have no money or intent to purchase his cocaine. This is a very exciting tour with a moderate survival rate. The Field of Dreams tour is the highlight to this three-part adventure, provided enough members of the group have survived to this point. This is a 3-day escapade into a very remote Sinaloa poppy plantation and will require the participants to be in top physical condition. The morning of the first day will be spent getting the group into costume and applying proper make up. Once everyone sufficiently resembles campinsinos, they will climb into the back of a battered and rusted pick up and head into the Sierra Madre. That evening the group will be given night vision goggles and the hike will begin. The first challenge will be to slip past the cartel soldiers that guard the poppy fields so that the group can enjoy sunrise amongst the colorful flowers. The second day will be spent working alongside the campinsinos that tend the fields, a cultural emersion that won’t soon be forgotten. This will be a great opportunity for the group to practice their Spanish. Phrases like “no, I am not a federal agent” or “please don’t point that thing at me” will be practiced during the lively discussions. The challenge that day will be conversing with proficiency adequate enough to keep from having electrodes attached to sensitive parts of the body. The third day will be a jolly game of hide and seek with armed psychopaths as we sprint through the foothills of the beautiful Sierra Madre. The extreme challenge for the third day will be to keep from collecting any .30 caliber perforations or losing any body parts. At present, the survival rate for this tour is a bit on the low side, but we are working on acquiring M16’s for all the participants. We believe that if properly equipped the group would only sustain a 50% loss. So, if you enjoy your adrenaline full strength and nonstop, this is a tour not to be missed.
|
Forums Index
Search Posts
Who's Online
Log In or Sign Up
