Forums > General > General Forum

1 2 3 View All

jennifer rose

Aug 16, 2006, 9:38 AM

Post #1 of 51 (4820 views)

Shortcut

The Brick Wall and Expats

Can't Post |

An expat who stays abroad for more than five years is not likely to return to his or her place of origin, but those who're here less than five years stand a good chance of moving back. There are two classes of expats: the short-timers and the long-termers. Often, the two groups tend not to associate with one another, and each has its own view of organized expat groups. What is your view of expat organizations? Do you participate in them, do you avoid them, and has your attitude toward them changed along with your tenure in Mexico? If you're a long-termer, how do you view short-timers? If you're a newcomer, what's your opinion of the long-termers?

Daisy

Aug 16, 2006, 10:08 AM

Post #2 of 51 (4792 views)

Shortcut

Re: [jennifer rose] The Brick Wall and Expats

Can't Post | Private Reply

That's a very interesting statistic. But I wonder if the study (whatever it is) included those part-timers of snowbirds and other long term seasonal residents. Or would they not be considered "expats"?

jennifer rose

Aug 16, 2006, 10:22 AM

Post #3 of 51 (4784 views)

Shortcut

Re: [Betty in KY] The Brick Wall and Expats

Can't Post |

For the purpose of the study --and this discussion -- snowbirds and part-timers would not be considered expatriates.

Rolly

Aug 16, 2006, 10:38 AM

Post #4 of 51 (4778 views)

Shortcut

Re: [jennifer rose] The Brick Wall and Expats

Can't Post | Private Reply

Here in Lerdo we have a very active expat group. It's kinda small -- just me. I like it that way. We do have a steady stream of short-timmers -- the Mormon missionaries. I like them because I have someone speak English with at church.

Rolly Pirate

(This post was edited by Rolly on Aug 16, 2006, 8:56 PM)

Anonimo

Aug 16, 2006, 3:39 PM

Post #5 of 51 (4711 views)

Shortcut

Re: [jennifer rose] The Brick Wall and Expats

Can't Post | Private Reply

The only *organized* group of expats with whom I participate in Pátzcuaro is a men's breakfast group that meets every Tuesday at 9 AM in alternating restaurants. Usually the breakfast is at Cha Cha Cha. I don't attend all these events, but sometimes they are very helpful as well as being fun.

Next month we will have been in México for a year. It's hard to believe that it has gone so fast. I don't consider us "long termers yet." In fact, we were not aware of a divide based on tenure. There are probably (hah!) more divides based on politics and personality incompatibilities.

I do get a lot of value from the Michoacán e-list fora, (they're free) particularly MoreliaConnect. I'd like to meet more of the members, not just the men. (Like couples, you know.)

We believe that one of the keys to our thriving here is getting to know our Mexican neighbors. We had done so in the past where we were living, and now, in this small, agrarian village, we are fast being introduced to new friends.
My only question is: what do we talk about after the introductions and amenities are done?

"En Boca Cerrada No Entran Moscas."

Saludos,
Anonimo

sparks

Aug 16, 2006, 5:52 PM

Post #6 of 51 (4680 views)

Shortcut

Re: [jennifer rose] The Brick Wall and Expats

Can't Post | Private Reply

Here in Melaque I'd wager we have 3 classes; the internet connected, the non internet connected and the disconnected. Being in a town that almost doubles in size over the winter most of us avoid the gathering places or watering holes during that season. I can't judge how many live here by internet participation and I guess that surprises me. I keep running into people that have made a nitch for themselves and have a circle of friends. Others seem to wander the streets by themselves and I have no idea.

Longer term people here act just about like up north, different interests, friends, etc. Some devlelop real relations with Mexicans beyond getting their houses cleaned or painted, they probably do the best when it comes to adjusting. Nothing like being a friend to someone that a lot of the locals know. You are immediately just one of the crowd rather than an outsider. Then again, thats about how it worked up north if you were new in town.

I've reached the point where I know 3 times as many Mexicans here as gringos (on a friendly basis) and that lack of isolation may be just what keeps me happy. I just know I have no urges to go north except to see family, friends and do a little business.

Learn some Spanish if you want to stick around !!

Sparks Mexico - Sparks Costalegre

TlxcalaClaudia

Aug 16, 2006, 8:06 PM

Post #7 of 51 (4640 views)

Shortcut

Re: [jennifer rose] The Brick Wall and Expats

Can't Post | Private Reply

Newcomer here. Love it here, doubt I am returning North for a couple years. Been here 2 months now. My kids are already on the path for their Mexican citizenship...I expect to remain here and do the same.

I do not associtate with expats other than the one I work with (from Canada). Wouldn't mind it, just too darn busy with work and kids to get out and seek any expats in Pachuca. In hubby's town of Apizaco, I never saw any (other than Ed and Fran who stopped in) and due to the large family I lived with, I stayed social and busy so didn't miss chatting with folks from home. Been working on my Spanish for 7 years now, so I do not feel at all uneasy in a room of Spanish speaking folks. I have jobs that offer opportunites to speak English daily. I have not yet felt isolated from my own language nor has it yet hit me that I am in another country. It feels like home to me here. The plans are to stay here if hubby can get a business off the ground. If not, we may return north.

My opinion of old timers here is that they are accepting of others and I like that. The blogs I read of some of you others are very positive.

Don't come if all you can do is point out how this or that isn't like home. Come and make a new home.

:)
Claudine

(This post was edited by TlxcalaClaudia on Aug 16, 2006, 8:11 PM)

Marlene

Aug 16, 2006, 8:43 PM

Post #8 of 51 (4626 views)

Shortcut

Re: [jennifer rose] The Brick Wall and Expats

Can't Post | Private Reply

Good topic for discussion.

Not exactly answering the questions but I wanted to touch on the Brick Wall. I personally am noticing real changes in the past couple of years in our area, and I suppose it is the power of the internet. Folks are arriving in droves determined to retire in Mexico. Most have done some research online but visited maybe only once for a short period and they come prepared to plunk down large sums of money to buy property right away!

The problem is when here on vacation, it isn't real day-to-day living and once moved and settled in, it becomes problematic for a variety of reasons, in many cases because 'they' don't speak much English. I believe that this, along with cultural differences, is a main reason some folks leave before the 5 year time frame Jennifer talked about.

The feelings of helplessness or frustration in not being able to express needs or wants can be quite overwhelming, something not given much thought to ahead of time as an obstacle. The internet chatter and forums makes it look easy, seamless. Big shock for some, upon arrival and believe it or not, many folks move here and are quite indignant that English isn't widely spoken.

Recent example....We were at a friend's house a couple of days ago when her doorbell was rung by a newly arrived (3 or 4 months) expat saying she and her husband were out of gas (propane) and would our friends call the gas company for them (not right now, but in 2 days when they would be home all day)... We asked her if she would like to have the phone number so she could call when it was convenient to her, and she quickly said "oh no, they don't speak English, how would I do that?". My husband reminded her that this is Mexico and we speak Spanish here, followed by a brief Spanish 101 for Gas Company lesson. She was not interested in that or taking the phone number with her. We later kidded our friend about being an enabler.

I spoke to a nice lady today whom I hadn't met before, and who is leaving after only two months (after investing a huge amount of money in expensive brand new furniture and appliances planning to be here forever). I was a little curious. She said "it just didn't work out". Sad. How does this happen? Hitting the brick wall prematurely?

jerezano

Aug 16, 2006, 8:54 PM

Post #9 of 51 (4621 views)

Shortcut

Re: [jennifer rose] The Brick Wall and Expats

Can't Post | Private Reply

Hello,

"The Brick Wall and Expats." A rather interesting concept.

First of all I have been here 18 years now and have built my own home. When I first came to Jerez de García Salinas in Zacatecas there were two gringos living here as full time residents. They had moved here from Long Beach because they were starving there. The rental costs ate up all their meager income. There were other part-time gringos: a missionary, an artist from Minnesotaa, an anthropologist who had fallen in love with Jerez when he worked as a youngster on the ruins at La Quemada, but lived in Winsconsin. No others.

Now with that background, I would like to know first of all where Jennifer got her statistics. It seems normal to me that people coming here to live in Mexico would determine within the first 5 years or so that they they were unhappy here and go somewhere more to their liking. I am a bit surprised about the 5 year cut-off. I would have assumed that two years maximum was a more likely period.

As the years went by, here in Jerez, we built up to a maximum of some 40 gringos as full time residents. That has now dropped to about 25 or so. But not because our resident gringos didn't like Mexico but because they have either died, moved to other locations in Mexico, or yes returned to the United States.

For example: Two were asked to leave by the authorities after they got into trouble with drugs. Rather than being thrown into jail as required by Mexican law, they were politely asked to leave and given the opportunity to do so. They left without taking any possesions except clothing. Two other gringas, not related, and completely independently in differemnt years, decided to go back to the USA after one-year trials. Three men and one woman died here in Mexico.

All our other lost permanent residents have moved to other regions in Mexico for one reason or another. Currently we have a long-time resident pair now living in Patscuaro where they bought a house. Wife is an artist. Another pair now living in Ajijic. They inherited money and could afford the move. One man moved to a small village near San Luis Potosí to be nearer to the Huichol Indian culture passing through the area on the way to Real de Catorce. One lady is in La Manzanilla but finding the costs excessive is trying to get back here. A widow had to return to the USA for health reasons and lack of money here. Another widow with resperatory problems moved to Colima because the altitude was getting to her. An artist living on a trust income returned to Colorado to fight with his trustee for a liveable income. Etc.

Now as to the attitude of our small gringo community as to gringo support groups; how to answer that question? First of all we don't have any such groups. Second when the local mayor proposed forming a local gringo society the response was a rotound negative. Don't ask me why. Third the women here who were part of married couples joined with the solteras to form informal groupings for coffee, church, dinners in the home, scrabble, etc. We solteros tend to be more satisfied without the social amenities. We all have been happy with the arrival of a Lutheran Missionary who has established a Lutheran Mission (successfully by the way). We can look forward to a professional who will assist in times of stress, and if need be, help with disposition of our bodies. Those early deaths I spoke of required more voluntary effort from the remaining gringos than some of us really cared to give.

Long-termers not associating with short-termers: This seems true only in larger populations where the short-termers tend to be tourists. Melaque, Morelia, Barra de Navidad, Ajijic, and numerous other locations.

In small towns such as Jerez, that is not true. We long-termers are always happy to see new residents. We get a bang out of helping them adjust to beloved Mexico, and that adjustment is NOT as easy as some people think. So, they really need and appreciate our help. This tends to make for a close-knit well-adjusted society, although there are always one or two people who want to be left alone. But the rest of us still worry about them and try to step in when it might be necessary.

It also tends to hurt some of our more trusting long-term residents and natives when some gringo "confindence man"comes along and milks what he can from our too-willing to help one another gringo residents. In my 18 years here we have had two such frauds pass through town with varying results. The last one milked a local hotel for a full week of rent and meals, some $2000 pesos of free rides from a taxi driver, and various amounts from our gringo society.

Does all this answer Jennifer's questions? I hope so. The answer has been long, but then Jennifer's and my experiences have been completely different. So have yours.

Adiós. jerezano.

(This post was edited by jerezano on Aug 16, 2006, 9:16 PM)

bournemouth

Aug 17, 2006, 7:05 AM

Post #10 of 51 (4566 views)

Shortcut

Re: [jerezano] The Brick Wall and Expats

Can't Post | Private Reply

We've been living away from the country of our birth for more years than I care to recall. On our travels I have definitely noticed that five years is the point by which people have begun to put down real roots and do not want to leave their current location. Prior to the five year point, people can leave easily - afterwards it's much harder - there is a sense of belonging.

johanson

Aug 17, 2006, 9:36 AM

Post #11 of 51 (4520 views)

Shortcut

Re: [bournemouth] The Brick Wall and Expats

Can't Post | Private Reply

I think the 5 year term is urban legend. I've heard that ever since I started coming to Mexico. But in support of that legend, it was after about 4 to 6 years of accumulated time for this snowbird before I knew that Ajijic was the city of choice for me.

The way the legend was explained to me was, many people come here for short periods of time, but if you make it through 5 years, you are probably going to stay around until either health forces you back or until you die.

MariaLund

Aug 17, 2006, 9:37 AM

Post #12 of 51 (4516 views)

Shortcut

Re: [jennifer rose] The Brick Wall and Expats

Can't Post | Private Reply

Hmm, my experiences as both a - multiple - expat and an even more multiple part timer (job assignments of several months to a year) may not be relevant, since I am neither an American expat not an expat in Mexico yet (though I'll start my tenure early next month - don't know yet how long but judging from my track record of getting bored with a place... heavens know), but may be there are some common denominators in that expat and brick wall (?) thing.

My few first "expat" experiences were that of a temporarily relocated abroad worker: to Germany, Hungary, Czech Republic and the then USRR. They were fun places to live short term because they were all exotic and the biggest hardship I ever encountered ( as I remember it now) was of being occassionally hungry in Germany when I missed their restaurant's lunchtime opening hours. Most " ground services " ( as we call it in Sweden) were arranged for me. No brick walls, no problems with language or culture or socializing with the natives.

I moved to Sweden as a de facto political refugee ( a defector, who did not claim refugee status, though that would have made things a lot easier, because I was afraid, that if I did, my communist homeland would retaliate and not let my little daughter join me in Sweden) with very limited funds ($200 in 1974), no knowledge of Swedish and only a vague ideas (from books, articles, censored and often biased) of what the country was and what living in there would be. I had to arrange everything from scratch on a shoestring budget and worrying about a child left behind and if I ever would be able to see her again. Getting in touch with an expat group would have been the most natural thing in the world but somehow it never occured to me. So I found my ways around a labirynth of obstacles, with an assistance of strangers ... though the most indebted for help I was to a Scotish family (expats, themselves) who took me on to their fabulous villa by the sea in a posh Stockholm suburb, housed me and fed me and paid me quite well under the pretext of me looking after their three boys ( ages 7,9 and 11) while they worked. Fortunately at that time I did not see it as a pretext, because I would have been too proud to accept "charity" and my life would have been much more difficult. With them I got introduced to the British Social Club - they were part owners of, so they frequented the premises very often and to the concept of how useful it is to rub shoulders with other expats. Later, I joined Polish expat groups and I really disliked them. I had to work politically in them (it was the Polish anticommunist movement's "Solidarity" time), but I found organizations as such boggled in endless turf wars and political infightings, though I am glad I met many very nice people there, whom I otherwise probably would not (different ages or professional or social circles).

When after 8 years in Sweden I emigrated from Sweden to the USA I was already feeling Swedish to some extent ( this 5 year barrier?) and together with my late Swedish hubby joined Swedish expat groups in addition to Polish expat groups. Sure we spent most of our time - both professionally and socially - with fellow Americans, that is the natives of the land (and here, probably lies the biggest difference between my expat experiences and that of predominantly retired Americans in Mexico), but we enjoyed cultural activities of those expat groups.

Swedes are master organizers and their groups are very well organized formally and run smoothly and many times as a part time business expat (be that in Italy, Germany, Singapore, Japan) I enjoyed an easy introduction to the other members of SWEA (with a world wide network, sadly Latin America being the only blank space... they have chapters in the Middle East, but none in the entire Latin America, hmmm), Swedish Women Educational Association, and still remember fondly panning for gold in Georgia, tasting wine in California, snowshoeing in Colorado, etc. etc as part of their activities.... and of course all those still friends in all those places.

Finally, as a newly minted early retiree I moved to Spain - to a portion of Spain where expats number around 25% of the population, so the expat life was an easy and a natural one. With all those social and interests clubs, some based on nationality/language, others purely on interests. Oh, my, it was so fun to be with other expats (Americans, Scandinavian, German) and they so dominated the social scene - even the streets in those small towns - it made meeting native locals difficult and I did not make an efford. I left Spain because at that time I yearned to go somewhere else, to see more and to do more, I missed work, and for a person my age it was the easiest to find an interesting pt job in the USA.

How will I like Mexico? Will I mix with the locals much? I don't know. I am used to socializing with highly educated people. I realize - after disussing with DoDi - that I really do not know how to relate to a fisherman or a villager, no matter if he/she is from my own country or anywhere else in the world, and in villages - other than those heavily expat "infested" ;-) people with university degrees are uncommon. So, it might be something new. And I'll let you know.
Vivere non est necesse, navigare necesse est!

(This post was edited by MariaLund on Aug 17, 2006, 10:41 AM)

sioux4noff

Aug 17, 2006, 3:25 PM

Post #13 of 51 (4443 views)

Shortcut

Re: [Marlene] The Brick Wall and Expats

Can't Post | Private Reply

We've only been in Mexico since October. Several times I asked my neighbors, who speak better Spanish than I, to call the electric company and the phone company for me. I really didn't know how to describe the problems or when to "push 1 for customer service". Now that I am more comfortable speaking Spanish, I make the calls myself.
Someone who has only been in a location for a couple months deserves to be cut a little slack. Remember when you first moved somewhere new? It can be overwhelming at moments.
I think if a person asks for help like that, you should help them and have them listen to your call so they will have more confidence later to do it themselves.
We have been fortunate to have people help us along the way and we try to pass the favor on to others as we can.

nfabq

Aug 17, 2006, 7:58 PM

Post #14 of 51 (4379 views)

Shortcut

Re: [jennifer rose] The Brick Wall and Expats

Can't Post | Private Reply

I'd love to see some of you respond to Jennifer's question re your view of organized expat groups and whether you participate in them. Thanks.

Norm

esperanza

Aug 17, 2006, 9:17 PM

Post #15 of 51 (4359 views)

Shortcut

Re: [nfabq] The Brick Wall and Expats

Can't Post | Private Reply

Hold that thought, Norm. I'm too tired to think tonight, but I'll post some thoughts tomorrow.

http://www.mexicocooks.typepad.com

Papirex

Aug 17, 2006, 10:52 PM

Post #16 of 51 (4346 views)

Shortcut

Re: [nfabq] The Brick Wall and Expats

Can't Post | Private Reply

I ignore the local English speaking ex-pat group, The Newcomers Club. http://clickoncuernavaca.com/newcomers/Newcomers.htm
I don’t avoid them; I just don’t need a support group. I don’t socialize with Americans, if fact, I have only met two other Americans here in a social setting. Almost all my friends are Mexicans. That’s not surprising, I live in Mexico.

I have nothing against my countrymen; I just don’t seek them out. I live in Mexico, if being around a lot of Americans was important to me; I would have stayed in Anchorage.

If I need to accomplish a task, I find out how to do it and do it myself. It’s the same way I lived my life nob. If I needed to do something, I found out how to do it, and did it. I never asked anyone how to get a driver’s license or how to open a bank account. I simply went to a bank or the DMV and asked what the local requirements were.

When ATM machines first started to appear in Mexico in the early 1990s, I didn’t ask anyone in Mexico whether or not my US ATM card would work down here. I went to my local bank and my local credit union branch in Anchorage and asked them. They told me at that time that they would not work until they had completed an agreement with the Mexican banking services. They expected that would take six months and to check back with them. Six months turned out to be 2 ½ years.

I think the ex-pat groups are probably very helpful for people arriving on an exploratory trip, or people that have just moved here with little or no Spanish skills, and no network of family or friends in Mexico.

I have recommended The Newcomers Club to a couple of Mexconnect members via PM. At least one of those people wrote to me and told me they had been very helpful, even though she told me that she and her family had decided not to move to Cuernavaca after a visit here. They stayed in a B&B arranged by someone at The Newcomers Club.

On their website the Newcomers Club claims a membership of only 200 people. For such a small organization they do have many services including a library, and discounts at some businesses when a person asks for it and shows their membership card.

In my opinion, and my opinion only, the biggest mistake that a lot of newcomers make is to try to drag The United States with them when they move to Mexico. They want to know which towns are English speaking, where they can live among liberals, get English language newspapers, watch and listen to English language American network TV and radio stations, buy American groceries, buy an American type of house, build a house out of hay bales or camel dung, or drag a double wide trailer down here, etc. etc. They are setting themselves up for a lot of angst. They won’t stay.

My attitude towards newcomers to Mexico is simply patience. I don’t know a way to accurately predict whether a person that moves here will stay or not. I have noticed that many of the people that move here and have lots of glib answers to every problem seem to disappear after a year or three. The people I think are most likely to stay here are people that are independant and used to standing on their own two feet without constantly asking others for help. Sometimes we all need help, but not for every little thing.

I spent my working life in construction. Every few years I moved to be near a project. I think it is probably much harder for a person that has lived their whole life in one place to make a move as drastic to them as coming to live in Mexico, and staying here.

I know my transition to living in Mexico was much easier than it is for most people because of my wonderful Mexican wife, and her family. I already had family and friends here several decades before I moved to Mexico. I knew what to expect, and what will never happen.

A common fantasy that many newcomers have is that all we foreigners need to do is to tell the Mexican people how we do things in our home country, and they will jump right on it and do things the way we do at home.

Rex

"The supreme happiness of life is the conviction that we are loved" - Victor Hugo

viajita

Aug 18, 2006, 12:17 PM

Post #17 of 51 (4245 views)

Shortcut

Re: [jennifer rose] The Brick Wall and Expats

Can't Post | Private Reply

I'm a long timer. Almost all my friends are Mexicans. I didn't move here to experience a gated "Little USA". I came here to learn, experience a new culture and make new friends. I don't participate in ex-pat groups. I don't feel like an ex-pat. I'm home.

sioux4noff

Aug 18, 2006, 1:32 PM

Post #18 of 51 (4229 views)

Shortcut

Re: [viajita] The Brick Wall and Expats

Can't Post | Private Reply

Just making an observation - The previous two posters denounce any association with expat groups but participate in this board. Which, IMO, is a cyber ex-pat group. Hmmm.

We are members of an "expat group" in Puerto Vallarta. We've met some nice folks there and the money raised by the group is used for many good causes. We are also members of a local civic group in our smalled town. That group is made up of Mexicans and people of other nationalities.
We don't have relatives here and neither one of us is Mexican. Being in these groups is a good way to meet people with similar interests. If one of us was Mexican and/or had family nearby it might change our assimilation into the community.
I am all for figuring out things for yourself, but then again, if I know someone else has done the same thing I need to do, I see no reason not to ask them about it, and every reason to ask them. Ever heard the expression "no need to reinvent the wheel"?
My life would not be improved by me searching on my own for the drivers license office, for instance, when my neighbor just got her license. She could tell me the things she needed to bring, where it is and the hours of the office. Then I could go take care of it.

Gringal

Aug 18, 2006, 3:21 PM

Post #19 of 51 (4212 views)

Shortcut

Re: [sioux4noff] The Brick Wall and Expats

Can't Post | Private Reply

" The previous two posters denounce any association with expat groups but participate in this board. Which, IMO, is a cyber ex-pat group. Hmmm. "
__________________

That's the kind of post that warms my cynical heart. Love it.

As you pointed out, there's no reason to re-invent the wheel. I've noticed that one of the major functions of Mexconnect is to pass along information to those who are in need of it. I don't know what I'd have done without the help of some generous people who were willing to share information when we first moved in Mexico, both real people and cyber-helpers. I've tried to pass it on.

I think the brick wall, if there is one, depends largely on where the person chooses to ex-pat. Everyone has limits on how much change and adaptation he/she can handle. Many choices are also dependent on age and physical condition. One picks a different sort of adventure at 60 than at 30.

Hang out with other expats? Depends on the nature of their and your interests.

caldwelld

Aug 18, 2006, 5:44 PM

Post #20 of 51 (4177 views)

Shortcut

Re: [jennifer rose] The Brick Wall and Expats

Can't Post | Private Reply

First of all Jennifer's "five year rule" is made up, probably from her own astute observation. It is a good one but far from fast and true. Some have to get out of town after six or seven years; some are stuck in after only a couple.

To paraphrase, I would certainly not want to belong to any club that would have me as a member. That being said I belong to a very ad hock group of long termers and we do lunch and other things often. No membership rules and no attendance requirements. I am also here on this forum but I do not consider it to be much of a club in as much as it is very easy to join without knowing a sole and is hard to get kicked out unless one violates one of the very few and very loosely enforced rules. Some have been known to have been "virtually kicked out" by being just plain stupid or just plain stupid - (read skin to thin or too thick).

I do not belong to any organised club of either expats or Mexicans. I would only join a real club now under duress. I worked all my life to have that option and I am proud of it and very keen on maintaining enough independance not to feel the need to have to join anything. There are tons of clubs in this town for both expats and Mexicans. Some join and some don't. I percieve that women feel a much stronger urge to "join". I heard someone say that women outnumber men 2 to 1 in all the clubs in town - probably another survey like Jennifer's. As someone on this forum said earlier "solateros" may not have quite the same urges. I had to belong to do my job in an earier incarnation. Now I don't. Love it!
dondon

kwschopf

Aug 18, 2006, 8:03 PM

Post #21 of 51 (4149 views)

Shortcut

Re: The Brick Wall and Expats

Can't Post | Private Reply

My husband and I are newcomers. We have only lived here for four months. Here in Puerto Vallarta, I meet lots of people who have been expats here for two or more decades. They are each here for a different reason and have a story to tell. The woman who lives upstairs from us has been here 27 years and still speaks very little Spanish. She is a delightful woman, who seems to have a mixture of (English-speaking) Mexican and ex-pat friends. We bought our house in Bucerias (where we will move in two weeks) from a Swedish woman who has been here nine years and she speaks very good Spanish - many of her friends seem to be Mexican. We have relied on the friendly assistance of people like Sioux4noff, who will soon be our neighbor in Bucerias, to find out how to navigate this new way of doing things. She and her husband Harold have already acquired a very positive reputation here for being generous and helpful. We have also relied on help from new Mexican friends, and so far, our Mexican friends outnumber our expat friends. The importance of learning Spanish to carry on day-to-day activities just can't be over-emphasized, and we have taken our first (of many, I am sure) Spanish class. I was able to purchase a new range and a living room sofa set yesterday, as well as arrange for delivery, entirely in Spanish, so I was pretty happy. But we have a long ways to go. Insofar as joining actual, not virtual, expat organizations, I guess we have not decided...Necesitamos pensarlo un poco mas. Once we get settled, we would like to participate in some community service activity, but I don't want to get enmeshed in partisanship and group politics. I worked with "coalitions" and committees my entire working life and I am not up for it. My husband and I are introverts who like to think of ourselves (or at least, each other) as "artists", i.e., I think he is an artist and he thinks I am an artist, but we may be the only ones who do. So once we get our house livable, we will spend alot of time in solitary activities. Isn't that what retirement is about? Doing the things you never had time for when you were working? Our plan is to stay here for the duration - we have cut most of our ties to the states. There is no way of knowing if or when we will hit that brick wall. But it is not in our plans...Karen

Tab

Aug 19, 2006, 11:53 AM

Post #22 of 51 (4064 views)

Shortcut

Re: [jennifer rose] The Brick Wall and Expats

Can't Post | Private Reply

While my husband and I have bought property in Rosario, Sinaloa we have not made the BIG move yet. What I have to say is how I feel now BEFORE I move there (hopefully for good). I am looking forward to joining an expat group in Rosario if one is available, or perhaps in Mazatlan. The simple reason I want to join is to "make friends", ease our integration to a new culture, and learn a thing or two the simpler way rather than the hard way (aka: why reinvent the wheel). If one moves to Mexico, it has to be expected that life is going to change in a big way and we are all human and would appreciate some help from time to time. I must believe that the majority of people are hopeful that it will change for the better - isn't that a big part of why they would make the big move? I don't understand why some people are so focused on just being friends with Mexicans or just being friends with Expats. Do we only see black and white? Correct me if I am wrong, but I don't feel like it should be about "where you are from" but rather "what you have in common to form a basis of friendship". I may be a dreamer - but I am Pisces and that is my nature. I hope that I will be open to talk to anyone who wants to chat with me - whether they are Mexican, American, Canadian, German, Swedish... It's just like we try to teach the children - just because he/she is black or white doesn't mean they are different. We should treat everyone as equals and stop seeing colour or nationalities - just see people.

Bubba

Aug 19, 2006, 1:22 PM

Post #23 of 51 (4043 views)

Shortcut

Re: [jennifer rose] The Brick Wall and Expats

Can't Post | Private Reply

Oddly enough, our brick wall is on the border re-entering the U.S. We cross it with great reluctance and only when absolutely necessary. That has been once in five years. We despise the expat social/civic clubs of all kinds and would never join one again.

I just passed a new gringo restaurant in Ajijic and it was packed with Peorians. Made my skin crawl.

Chaipas beckons.

To each his own.

bournemouth

Aug 19, 2006, 5:56 PM

Post #24 of 51 (3983 views)

Shortcut

Re: [Bubba] The Brick Wall and Expats

Can't Post | Private Reply

And would this be the restaurant where, on another forum site, you have just announced you are going to have a Philly cheese steak sandwich - and maybe some chicken wings?

Bubba

Aug 19, 2006, 6:24 PM

Post #25 of 51 (3978 views)

Shortcut

Re: [bournemouth] The Brick Wall and Expats

Can't Post | Private Reply

Yes, bournemouth. That was the place (in Ajijic). I have now had their Philly Cheese Steak and chicken wings in three varieties. Boy, I´ll tell you´ns this. If that´s what Philadelphia and chickens have to offer, neither gone be flyin´ into this redneck´s back yard twice..

I be goin´ out to reinforce that brick wall to stop that gringo stampede..

(This post was edited by Bubba on Aug 19, 2006, 6:27 PM)

1 2 3 View All