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pat

Jun 21, 2005, 8:39 AM

Post #26 of 41 (1235 views)

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Re: [Bubba] Some Things I'll Never Learn (about living in Mexico)

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Talosian,

I sure hope Bubba offered to pay for those frogs. If not, that is adding injury to insult.

Pat


jennifer rose

Jun 21, 2005, 8:44 AM

Post #27 of 41 (1229 views)

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Re: [Elaine] Some Things I'll Never Learn (about living in Mexico)

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The same guy doesn't deliver the CFE, water and other bills, so the tip would be wasted. But even for those who don't get any mail or have it delivered to a PO box, box affixed to the inside of the gate and accessible from the street is an essential for those bills.


Elaine


Jun 21, 2005, 10:40 AM

Post #28 of 41 (1205 views)

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Re: [jennifer rose] Some Things I'll Never Learn (about living in Mexico)

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Wasted? Don't think so. Maybe I'd be giving a small tip to 3 or 4 guys. It would be better than not getting the bills. I don't look at it as any different than giving the postman and paper delivery people a small gift at Xmas every year. I get very good service and it costs me very little. I still would go for the honey. Besides, word gets around very quickly about you being a nice person or a crabby one. If you sit back and people watch, you can see people who are mean and crabby and they just can not understand why nothing goes right for them. They just don't get it. Probably never will.

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When one door closes, another opens. Some people are so busy looking at the door that has closed, they don't see the door that has opened. Keep looking for those open doors.
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Carron

Jun 21, 2005, 2:14 PM

Post #29 of 41 (1161 views)

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Re: [Elaine] Some Things I'll Never Learn (about living in Mexico)

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You can buy mail boxes at most ferreterias (hardware stores). They are of metal and have the word "Buzon" stamped on them.


Gringal

Jun 21, 2005, 2:58 PM

Post #30 of 41 (1150 views)

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Re: [Elaine] Some Things I'll Never Learn (about living in Mexico)

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Nice thought - but our house is surrounded by a high wall. No front door accessible, and the "door" in the wall is solid steel. We never see the guy(s) who delivers the utility bills, so applying honey or vinegar is not the point here. Our problem is with the utility companies who refuse to deliver bills to our local mail stop, three blocks from here. And why not? No reason. Just: "we deliver them personally to your house". Except that they don't. They go to someone up the street, or next door, or into outer space. In a year, two have actually wound up under our gate. Therefore, we guess at the date and stand in a long line once a month to find out, and pay.

By the time someone posts something "they'll never learn", they've usually addressed the likely answers.
As a for instance, someone suggested that a mailbox in the front gate was the solution. Not likely, if the mail is going to the wrong house. Also, in this neighborhood, a box would provide a grand opportunity for the insertion of all manner of interesting objects, including firecrackers. These are lobbed over the wall or up on the roof, as it is. When you live in a barrio chock full of little boys running in packs, the mischief comes with the territory. This is a working class Mexican neighborhood where the kids don't come in at night until after dark. The streets are their playground. Front doors are within enclosed courtyards in the typical house and front gates require keys. Being a good neighbor is throwing the soccer ball back over the wall to the kids when it strays. Mailmen are invisible. The mail is shoved under the gate, rain or shine.


Elaine


Jun 21, 2005, 3:35 PM

Post #31 of 41 (1139 views)

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Re: [Gringal] Some Things I'll Never Learn (about living in Mexico)

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Well, it looks like you only have two options. You can sit around and do nothing and thus be able to justify your complaining or you can try something, anything. I'm a "try, try, try again" gal. If something doesn't work, I'll find something that will. If nothing works after trying everything I can think of and that others suggest, I'll still keep working on the problem. I do not give up. I firmly believe that where there is a will, there is a way. I have used this method in situations that everyone said was hopeless but I eventually found a way. I even took on the state of Texas, long story, and won!!!

Oh, and BTW, steel doors can be cut for a mail drop.

***********************************************************
When one door closes, another opens. Some people are so busy looking at the door that has closed, they don't see the door that has opened. Keep looking for those open doors.
***********************************************************


Elaine


Jun 21, 2005, 3:39 PM

Post #32 of 41 (1138 views)

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Re: [Gringal] Some Things I'll Never Learn (about living in Mexico)

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P.S. Have you ever brought home a bag of candy for the neighborhood kids or a case of sodas? Doing something small for the neighborhood kids goes a long way. I use to live in a neighborhood that was having problems with kids, but I never had any. I credit it to the fact that I did something nice for the kids ever so often, not anything real big, just little things.

***********************************************************
When one door closes, another opens. Some people are so busy looking at the door that has closed, they don't see the door that has opened. Keep looking for those open doors.
***********************************************************


Bear

Jun 21, 2005, 3:56 PM

Post #33 of 41 (1130 views)

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Re: [Elaine] Some Things I'll Never Learn (about living in Mexico)

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Good idea.


Gringal

Jun 21, 2005, 3:59 PM

Post #34 of 41 (1129 views)

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Re: [Elaine] Some Things I'll Never Learn (about living in Mexico)

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This thread was started as a non-serious opportunity for people to list the exasperating little things that happen, only in Mexico. Non-serious!

My utility bill problems are common, unimportant, and f'hevvins sake, if you actually read the part of my post where I explained that having/not having a mailbox in which to deposit a bill will not help the fact that the bills are delivered to other people or to the skies above, but not to my house - under the door or over the top. The same non-delivery would happen with a handy box sitting in the door.

Anyone who lives here for awhile finds out that Mexico is a place where things often are as they are, won't change, and one needs a sense of proportion, a sense of humor and an occasional helpless shrug to enjoy living here. And now, adios. My thread has ended.


(This post was edited by Gringal on Jun 21, 2005, 4:21 PM)


bournemouth

Jun 21, 2005, 4:57 PM

Post #35 of 41 (1110 views)

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Re: [Elaine] Some Things I'll Never Learn (about living in Mexico)

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Elaine - I don't think Gringal was complaining, simply telling her tale of things in Mexico she'll not get used to. You've escalated it to another level and are chiding her unnecessarily. It's not pleasant so please desist. I know that we sometimes have problems with various utility bills in spite of having both a post office box and a buzon at the front door. It's a "Mexico thing".


hoping 2

Jun 21, 2005, 5:35 PM

Post #36 of 41 (1095 views)

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Re: [bournemouth] Some Things I'll Never Learn (about living in Mexico)

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In reading Gringal's post, it did sound like a problem. Without body language or voice intonation, it can be very hard to get the right slant on things.I think Elaine was answering with possible solutions, to be helpful. Because the situation could have solutions. Also it is two people with different attitudes toward handling problems, neither right or wrong, just different. Obviously, Elaine thinks when life gives you lemons make lemonade, even if you have only been given the seeds!


not_ally

Jun 21, 2005, 6:00 PM

Post #37 of 41 (1082 views)

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Re: [hoping 2] Some Things I'll Never Learn (about living in Mexico)

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I think part of the problem is not understanding various aspects of living in Mexico. In a neighborhood like Gringal's, if you give kids candy they will be at your house every single day, sometimes more than that, for the daily sugar dispensation. Or to carry your grocery bags for some pocket money, or to watch cable tv or movies on the DVD player. It just doesn't work to hypothesize about solutions unless you live here.
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"The first question I ask myself when something doesn't seem to be beautiful is why do I think it's not beautiful. And very shortly I discover there is no reason." John Cage


Elaine


Jun 21, 2005, 6:18 PM

Post #38 of 41 (1074 views)

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Re: [Gringal] Some Things I'll Never Learn (about living in Mexico)

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I'm sorry if I took your posting wrong. You just sounded like one of my sisters who ALWAYS plays the "Poor Me" game. She complains about any and everything. It doesn't matter who gives her what solution for her problem she always says, "But then ..." followed by a reason why that won't work. It doesn't matter what anyone says, she always has a reason why it won't work. I've gotten to the point that I just ask her what she's going to do about her problems. She never knows. I finally realized that complaining is more important to her than fixing her life.

***********************************************************
When one door closes, another opens. Some people are so busy looking at the door that has closed, they don't see the door that has opened. Keep looking for those open doors.
***********************************************************


hoping 2

Jun 21, 2005, 6:42 PM

Post #39 of 41 (1064 views)

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Re: [not_ally] Some Things I'll Never Learn (about living in Mexico)

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I live here in a neighborhood of mostly Mexicans and can't stand the "implied attitude" of "us and them". It is really annoying and condescending. Sure there are cultural differences. Many "NOB" enjoy asking where do you live ( with "that intonation" ) to see if even a fellow "NOB"er is good enough or lives in the "right" area. Because in our culture material things are more important than family, true friends, being a good neighbor even when it is not convenient, things that are evident in a Mexican village, if you treat others the way you would want to be treated. Instead of them and us. Mexicans smile at life and everyone else even when given lemons. Something that is missing in the US. They greet you on the street and never missing doing so and wait to hear how you are, what is happening and even if they don't care, you would never know.

Sure the kids could become a nuisance if you don't draw limits and do whatever ( tip, give candy,etc.) all the time. But if you say not today firmly, they respect it. The children are friendly and well behaved for the most part. Children, anywhere can become a nuisance, does that mean we should ignore them or not be nice?

Granted I've had to get use to the Mexican cultural things living in the village, we all do. That is a "Mexican thing". Serenades at 3:30 AM or 6:30AM fireworks that may continue most of the day.
Loud firecrackers, music, voices and people out at all hours. But not all the time, there are times of peace, which I appreciate even more. The constant barage of people wanting tips for everything from the "rich gringo" But who gave them that impression? Who tipped for everything, didn't draw limits? In our culture appearing rich is more important than honesty, integrity or at times, even one another or family. I wonder why they think we are all rich?

If somebody looked at our culture the way we dissect theirs, how would we stand? We moved here for a reason, was it just cost of living and good climate? If we are all so successful, there are other places with nice climate. We are guests in their country.

I will get off my soapbox now. To the previous poster; there were a couple things said in your post that just touched this off, the anger is not meant to be directed at you. Just to make people think.

To Jennifer Rose, I am sorry this was meant to be a good hearted and humorous thread, which I was enjoying. But I felt some things need to be said.


not_ally

Jun 21, 2005, 7:57 PM

Post #40 of 41 (1039 views)

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Re: [hoping 2] Some Things I'll Never Learn (about living in Mexico)

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No offense taken, Hoping, as soon as I posted I realized that it sounded pretty wicked-witchy ("sure I like children, as long as they're in soup"). I didn't edit it because despite the negativity it is one of the cultural differences that's most difficult for me sometimes, the lack of privacy. Like you, I live in a middle-class Mexican neighborhood (in my case, maybe working class, actually); the kids there are actually not always so well behaved, and I don't really want to encourage them to ring my doorbell (sometimes for five minutes at a time) whenever they think I'm home. What I do that seems to work is to chat with their mothers and grandmothers when I see them in the street, and take over food every once in a while when I make a special meal, which at least ensures grand/maternal intervention if they think the gringa is being pestered. I guess the bottom line is that what works depends on your own situation.
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"The first question I ask myself when something doesn't seem to be beautiful is why do I think it's not beautiful. And very shortly I discover there is no reason." John Cage


Gringal

Jun 21, 2005, 8:29 PM

Post #41 of 41 (1027 views)

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Re: [Elaine] Some Things I'll Never Learn (about living in Mexico)

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Well, sometimes we have relatives like that. We just can't extend that thought to the rest of the universe. Have a good day.
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