Forums > General > Living, Working, Retiring

1 2 3 View All

arbon

Jan 22, 2003, 5:41 PM

Post #1 of 59 (8544 views)

Shortcut

Mexican Humor..A New Forum?

Can't Post |

With regard to earthquakes -

One detects that a strong earthquake in a remote zone will come
from the state of Oaxaca. The center of prevention of disasters in the
CD of Mexico sends a telegram to a small municipal head in the region:
"Hard anticipated telluric movement in its zone. To take the necessary
providencias ". To the fifteen days finally answer in the CD of Mexico
is received: "controlled Movement. Telluric and other 15 good assured
in the jail. We had not answered because there was a tremor of
car@$% (caratpesopercent)."

Greetings with scare and tremors,

alex .

Jan 23, 2003, 2:54 PM

Post #2 of 59 (7989 views)

Shortcut

Re: [arbon] Mexican Humor..A New Forum?

Can't Post | Private Reply

There was a young man who had a pretty bride that he called "Mi Chulita" (beautiful little one). After a few years of comfortable marriage she gained a bit of weight and now he calls her "Mi Chuleta." (porkchop)

One letter can make a huge difference, verdad?
Alex

Mereja

Jan 23, 2003, 4:37 PM

Post #3 of 59 (7943 views)

Shortcut

Re: [alex sometimes in TJ] Mexican Humor..A New Forum?

Can't Post |

I truly feel very sorry for your poor wife and what she has to put up with. Somehow, even if she hasn't gained any weight, I don't think she would think that this is funny. Does she have a nickname for you?

arbon

Jan 23, 2003, 5:00 PM

Post #4 of 59 (7920 views)

Shortcut

Re: [Mereja] Mexican Humor..A New Forum?

Can't Post |

"There was a young man who had a pretty bride"

That can't be Alex,he is OLD. Crazy

Mereja

Jan 23, 2003, 5:25 PM

Post #5 of 59 (7907 views)

Shortcut

Re: [arbon] Mexican Humor..A New Forum?

Can't Post |

Oh!!!! That's right. I forgot. Sorry Alex. But that actually makes it worse, I think. If he was young and handsome, I could see maybe putting up with a little bit of that kind of stuff, but in this case, if I were her, I would think twice. Now that she is legal in the US...... I better not not say any more.

Rolly

Jan 23, 2003, 5:32 PM

Post #6 of 59 (7899 views)

Shortcut

Re: [alex sometimes in TJ] Mexican Humor..A New Forum?

Can't Post | Private Reply

If you want to change one letter, try this one:

Mi casa es tu case = Mi cama es tu cama.

I get lots of smiles, sometimes laughs, when I great old ladies as Mamasita.

Rolly Pirate

arbon

Jan 23, 2003, 5:35 PM

Post #7 of 59 (7890 views)

Shortcut

Re: [Mereja] Mexican Humor..A New Forum?

Can't Post |

So I know this guy from the North Wet,he's always complaining about the rain.

So I told him how nice & sunny it is in Puerto Vallarta Mexico.

But he said "I can't speak any Spanish".

I said "no problem,just talk slowly"

He went to PV,checked into the hotel room,dropped his suitcase & went strait down to the bar.

The waiter came over & the guy said "I.........w o u l d......l i k e......a.......

b e e r...... p l e a s e".

The waiter said "y e s.......s i r"

The guy "t h a n k.......y o u"

The waiter "y o u....a r e...n o t...f r o m...a r o u n d...h e r e...a r e...y o u..s i r"

The guy "n o...I...a m...f r o m...V a n c o u v e r"

The waiter "I...a m...f r o m...V a n c o u v e r...t o o"

The guy "t h e n...w h y...a r e...w e...b o t h...s p e a k i n g...S p a n i s h ?

(This post was edited by arbon on Jan 23, 2003, 5:48 PM)

jennifer rose

Jan 23, 2003, 5:56 PM

Post #8 of 59 (7946 views)

Shortcut

Re: [arbon] Mexican Humor..A New Forum?

Can't Post |

A Chinese guy was in Mexico, and he couldn’t speak Spanish. But he wanted to eat. So he learned “Arroz y frijoles.” He simply repeated “arroz y frijoles” each time he went to a restaurant. Finally, after weeks of nothing but arroz y frijoles, he decided that he should try something new. He overheard someone ordering chilaquiles, so the next time he was in a restaurant, he told the water he wanted “chilaquiles.”

The waiter asked “Con o sin crema?” which, of course, the Chinese guy didn’t understand. So the waiter repeated “Con or sin crema?” The Chinese guy still didn’t understand, and after the waiter’s impatience began to show, the Chinese guy relented and ordered “Arroz y frijoles.”

sparks

Jan 23, 2003, 6:10 PM

Post #9 of 59 (7883 views)

Shortcut

Re: [jennifer rose] Mexican Humor..A New Forum?

Can't Post |

It's those numbered menus that he was used to. It could just as well been a guy from Seattle (like me).

Mereja

Jan 23, 2003, 7:07 PM

Post #10 of 59 (7863 views)

Shortcut

Re: [sparks] Mexican Humor..A New Forum?

Can't Post |

A Mexican went into the store in the US and wanted to buy some sox. He didn’t know the word for sox so he said as best he could “I would like some calsatines”. The salesperson wanting to be very helpful she showed him the shoes. He said, “no, ese no es.” She took him to the shirts and again he said, “no, ese no es.” Then she took him to the pants and he said. “no, ese no es.” She began to get a little frustrated because she other customers to attend to. Finally she took him to the socks and happily he said, “S O C K S.” But he couldn’t figure out why she got a dirty look on her face a stormed off.

Mereja

Jan 23, 2003, 7:11 PM

Post #11 of 59 (7858 views)

Shortcut

Re: [arbon] Mexican Humor..A New Forum?

Can't Post |

My sister use to talk really loud at my husband. Especially when he didn't understand her, she would talk louder and louder saying the same thing over and over. I had to remind her he wasn't deaf, and no matter how loud she talked it wouldn't make him understand unless she used different words that might be more familiar to him.

Mereja

Jan 23, 2003, 7:14 PM

Post #12 of 59 (7849 views)

Shortcut

Re: [Rolly] Mexican Humor..A New Forum?

Can't Post |

I knew a couple that were in Columbia trying to learn Spanish, he told some friends, instead of that his wife was "en la cama hasta las doce", he said "mi esposa estaba en la cama con doce."

He also told some friends, instead of "mi esposa va a venir sin falta manana", he said "mi esposa va a venir sin falda manana."

It makes a big difference.

sparks

Jan 23, 2003, 7:21 PM

Post #13 of 59 (7850 views)

Shortcut

Re: [Mereja] Mexican Humor..A New Forum?

Can't Post |

And he could speak spanish all along ... dirty trick

Escoces aka escott

flambe

Jan 23, 2003, 7:40 PM

Post #14 of 59 (7845 views)

Shortcut

Mereja, loud talking people

Can't Post |

Mereja,

I liked the loud talking one. That's so typical. Gives a new meaning to "I'll holla at ya."

Mereja

Jan 23, 2003, 8:27 PM

Post #15 of 59 (7829 views)

Shortcut

Re: [alex sometimes in TJ] Mexican Humor..A New Forum?

Can't Post |

You holla at ya wife too Alex, or does she holla at ya because ya not such a yougin anymo? Comprende?

alex .

Jan 24, 2003, 8:26 AM

Post #16 of 59 (7813 views)

Shortcut

Re: [Mereja] what kind of confrontation are you seeking ?

Can't Post | Private Reply

Whatever it is, take it outside. Ping my e-mail, we'll telephone, or meet for coffee. You choose.

I am indeed old, about halfway through my life I estimate. My wife is indeed very pretty (and I tell her so every day) and younger than I. She is with me by choice: she has a paid for apartment in Tijuana, a home in Zihuatanejo, and a brand new SUV in her name to get there. She is with me because I'm a great guy, you'll just have to get used to it.
Alex

(This post was edited by alex sometimes in TJ on Jan 24, 2003, 8:43 AM)

Mereja

Jan 24, 2003, 9:09 AM

Post #17 of 59 (7790 views)

Shortcut

Re: [alex sometimes in TJ] what kind of confrontation are you seeking ?

Can't Post |

I am truly sorry if I hurt your feelings. I see you can't take a joke!!!!

I don't think we should have a confrontation, because I would win, without a doubt, because you see, I have my glue gun at my side at all times.

No te preocupes, be happy.

Okay, I will leave you alone for a while. We don't want this whole thread to disappear.

Attachments:

:biggrinbounce2 (0 B)

Denis

Jan 24, 2003, 11:14 AM

Post #18 of 59 (7773 views)

Shortcut

Re: [arbon] Mexican Humor..A New Forum?

Can't Post |

It's a good thing the Spanish original of this is on the Learning Spanish forum, this didn't make much sense.

Slightly off-topic, but having to do with changing one letter:

(glossary below)
An American woman goes into a department store in France and says, "Je voudrai un matelot."
The clerk reacts with puzzlement, so the woman tries to explain, "Pour coucher avec."

French glossary:
coucher = to lie down
matelas = mattress
matelot = sailor
vouloir = to want

BTW, thanks for the hint on what I could call my honey (chulita). A woman friend saw a picture of her and described her as such. But to me she's always been mi amor ... a term which I belatedly realized she used to address any young child. But I guess it's like "honey" or "sweetie," so I assume that's OK.

sparks

Jan 24, 2003, 4:32 PM

Post #19 of 59 (7744 views)

Shortcut

Re: [arbon] Mexican Humor..A New Forum?

Can't Post |

Am I incorrect in remembering that Colima has been PRD supporters ?

johnr

Jan 24, 2003, 10:54 PM

Post #20 of 59 (7703 views)

Shortcut

Re: [Mereja] Mexican Humor..A New Forum?

Can't Post |

My dear, as a male gringo, I am stunned by the way Mexican women refer to their best friends and even daughters or mothers: vieja, gorda. . . In the best of cases, neither applies, of course.

Now I admit that (a) foreigners and especially (b) males follow such practices at their peril (as Diego Fernandez de Cevallos found out a few years back).

Alteño

Jan 24, 2003, 11:26 PM

Post #21 of 59 (7703 views)

Shortcut

Re: [johnr] Mexican Humor..A New Forum?

Can't Post |

Are you aware of the way Argentinians colloquially call their Mother and Father? Vieja and Viejo, as terms of endearment. It translates to english as "old one" but with a lot of respect attached to this twist of the term.

The term "viejerío" used by Diego had a whole different connotation than the related term "vieja". That is a "Ranchero" term, not taken as offensive in "Mexican Ranchero context", like in Jalisco (Diego's land), where it is properly understood. But, the chilangas "capitalinas" jumped at it promptly. I guess he did it on purpose. Don Diego Fernández y de Cevallos really masters Castillian Spanish.

arbon

Jan 25, 2003, 12:05 AM

Post #22 of 59 (7697 views)

Shortcut

Re: [Alteño] Mexican Humor..A New Forum?

Can't Post |

That you have written, is maybe all well and correct, but do you have any Mexican Humor.?

Alteño

Jan 25, 2003, 12:42 AM

Post #23 of 59 (7697 views)

Shortcut

Re: [arbon] Mexican Humor..A New Forum?

Can't Post |

Plenty of Humor, but it gets lost in the translation, at least from my point of view. That telúrico joke almost made it, but I don't think it translated well, it needs context. If a joke needs explanation, it is no longer funny.

gpkisner

Jan 25, 2003, 3:46 PM

Post #24 of 59 (7652 views)

Shortcut

Re: [arbon] Mexican Humor..A New Forum?

Can't Post |

http://stormpages.com/cabobob/Jokes.htm#CHISTES

flambe

Jan 25, 2003, 6:56 PM

Post #25 of 59 (7623 views)

Shortcut

Re: [Mereja] what kind of confrontation are you seeking ?

Can't Post |

Oh my GAWD, glue gun? Wow! That would make that Chuleta awfully sticky! Yuk! :}

1 2 3 View All