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Hound Dog

Oct 22, 2009, 6:54 AM

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See You Later, Mr. Chan*

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* With thanks to Mantan Moreland (Birmingham Brown) in a 1930s classic Charlie Chan movie as the two plus Number One son exited a haunted house.

Since we live in both Chiapas and Jalisco and both cities we live in have high and increasing crime rates, particularly home burglaries and, at times home assaults, we put sophisticated,constantly monitored motion detector home alarm systems in both houses and we also use house sitters to live in each home when we are at the other. Now, these alarm systems are expensive and we keep nothing of real value in either house so these alarm systems are there mainly to protect us personally from intruders but here is the story:

Our alarm system in Chiapas has already thwarted two attempted break-ins and in San Cristóbal de Las Casas where neighbors always watch out for neighbors since they know from many years of experience that they are on their own, the loud alarm, when tripped has brought out neighbors ready to do battle and when I say that about San Cristóbal I am talking serious folks intent on summary punishment so miscreants typically hope the cops show up presently.

We just installed the system at our Lake Chapala residence after living there for nearly nine years with no protection because the community that expats residing thereabouts, mostly NOB retirees, often refer to as "Lakeside" (roughly an area extending from about the Chapala/Poncitlan municipal border on the east to about the western outskirts of Jocotepec on the west) has been experiencing a spike in home break-ins concurrent with hard economic times and increased unemployment. Because of that deteriorating climate in social stability (as we see it), we felt an alarm system was warranted despite the expense.

Anyway, about a month after installing that alarm system at our Lake Chapala home, last night at 3:00AM the alarm sounded and we responded with garden lights and armed with appropriate defensive equipment and, later, the motion detector system informed us that there had been an intrusion at the front of our residence indicating our exterior stone walls had been breached and someone with ill intent had approached our front door and that moron was long gone by the time we got to the area breached and, as Forrest Gump would say, "Here is all I have to say about that.":

Some gangbanger´s mama was doing hard duty cleaning that dude´s underwear later in the day.

"Feets don´t fail me now"

"Able to leap tall walls with a single bound"

I realize they can still get to us but if so they´ll leave here with a worthless old SONY TV that weighs at least 300 pounds and some stale Cheerios we didn´t want in the first place. As for precious belongings, I lost my Dick Tracy Decoder Ring years ago and they can have that Jesus portrait where the eyes follow you across the room. If they take that damn dog, they´ll have to pay us to take him back.

Postscript:
This crime wave is not limited to Mexico and I say that because there has been much misleading information in the worldwide press lately. We just returned from visiting family all over France and have relatives in Alabama and California as well and all of these folks with close ties to us are suffering these criminal home incursions as well. Don´t think you can escape from this unless you want to freeze your buns off in Norway or some other such God forsaken place.


(This post was edited by Hound Dog on Oct 22, 2009, 7:13 AM)



gpkgto

Oct 22, 2009, 10:54 AM

Post #2 of 31 (6007 views)

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Re: [Hound Dog] See You Later, Mr. Chan*

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Glad your alarm systems worked--how expensive are they, mas o menos?


chinagringo


Oct 22, 2009, 11:15 AM

Post #3 of 31 (6003 views)

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Re: [gpkisner] See You Later, Mr. Chan*

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If you want some entertainment and see what is available NOB go to: www.x10.com. Most of their systems can be self installed and some have amazing capabilities.
Regards,
Neil
Albuquerque, NM



Hound Dog

Oct 22, 2009, 11:24 AM

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Re: [gpkisner] See You Later, Mr. Chan*

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Well, gp, I don´t like to talk actual money because that exposes Dawg to ridicule but since this is an issue facing many of us I´ll confess to a mas o menos figure which may or may not fit the reader´s needs. We have a large garden in Lakeside and live in an area with other large properties largely inhabited by foreigners and well-to-do Mexicans with extensive gardens but, on the other hand, our Chiapas home is in a highly urbanized environment of contiguous , modest to splendid homes inhabited by a mix of the poor and middle class and affluent but the key here is (1) proximity and (2) attitude.

Our constantly monitored alarm system in Chiapas is much less expensive then the one at Lakeside for the initial equipment investment but the property is also much less complex. I hate to predict anything but just get bids based on your situation and expect to spend between $5000 Pesos and $30000 Pesos. The monthly monitoring bill should be around $400 Pesos.

Just call around for bids but keep in mind that you want a company that will be there and respond when you need them. That is critical.


gpkgto

Oct 22, 2009, 11:32 AM

Post #5 of 31 (5994 views)

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Re: [Hound Dog] See You Later, Mr. Chan*

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Thanks!


Axixic


Oct 22, 2009, 5:32 PM

Post #6 of 31 (5948 views)

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Re: [Hound Dog] See You Later, Mr. Chan*

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If they take that damn dog, they´ll have to pay us to take him back.


Are you talking about the ugly a** hairless, native South American/ Mexican dog you were once so proud of? They are good watch dogs about like a Greyhound is a watch dog, they watch, watch the bandits walk off with everything.


(This post was edited by PamelaDelafield on Oct 22, 2009, 5:35 PM)


Hound Dog

Oct 22, 2009, 6:01 PM

Post #7 of 31 (5938 views)

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Re: [PamelaDelafield] See You Later, Mr. Chan*

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Are you talking about the ugly a** hairless, native South American/ Mexican dog you were once so proud of?

Pamela, dear, it is never appropriate to end a sentence with a preposition.

Redneck Auburn boy is awarded a scholarship to Harvard and the first day on campus he is strolling along the quadrangle and he spots this effete Eastern snob and and asks :

"Pardon me sir but could you please tell me where the admissions office is at?"

To which the Harvard snot replies:

"At Harvard we do not end a sentence with a preposition."

To which the Auburn redneck replies:

" Pardon me sir, but could you please tell me where the admissions ofiice is at, asshole?"


(This post was edited by Hound Dog on Oct 22, 2009, 6:10 PM)


Axixic


Oct 23, 2009, 3:10 AM

Post #8 of 31 (5886 views)

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Re: [Hound Dog] See You Later, Mr. Chan*

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As always, you are so right, but you didn't answer the question. Is your watchdog the butt ugly Xoloitzcuintli of which you were once so proud?
Attachments: Xoloitzcuintli 3.jpeg (2.72 KB)


Hound Dog

Oct 23, 2009, 8:34 AM

Post #9 of 31 (5848 views)

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Re: [PamelaDelafield] See You Later, Mr. Chan*

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As always, you are so right, but you didn't answer the question. Is your watchdog the butt ugly Xoloitzcuintli of which you were once so proud?

A good question, Pamela and no, that is not the watchdog to whom I refer; rather, that is a ratty little street dog who moved in with us without clearing the move beforehand.

The Xoloitxqunitli to whom you refer is known around these parts as The Princess and she is way too elegant and beautiful to be living with an obese southern clodhopper such as Dawg who should have never been allowed to cross the Butler County, Alabama line on his way to Mexico via San Francisco but that´s another story. The Princess is both the smartest and most aristocratic dog we have ever owned (or as these dog freak foreigners at Lakside would put it; with whom we have shared our lives) and we have become Xoloitzquintli freaks. We know now from personal experience that Mexicans, especially indigenous folks, love these dogs to an almost obsessive degree and consider her,as do we, a duende, not a dog. These dogs are magical creatures and we´ll have more as companions in the future. Forget those ruffian Idaho born mastiff morons.

Does that cover your inquiry?


(This post was edited by Hound Dog on Oct 23, 2009, 8:37 AM)


Axixic


Oct 23, 2009, 8:45 AM

Post #10 of 31 (5840 views)

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Re: [Hound Dog] See You Later, Mr. Chan*

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If Mexicans think so highly of the Xoloitzcuintli, a hairless, crooked tooth altogether weird looking dog, why did they used to eat them? In you case, we need to add dog to the following Mencken quote.

We must respect the other fellow's religion, but only in the sense and to the extent that we respect his theory that his wife is beautiful and his children smart. H. L. Mencken

Quote


Gringal

Oct 23, 2009, 9:22 AM

Post #11 of 31 (5838 views)

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Re: [PamelaDelafield] See You Later, Mr. Chan*

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The Lewis and Clark expedition, when it got way up north there in salmon country and snugged down with the local Indians, much preferred dog to salmon. No accounting for taste, eh?

Now, as to Beauty and Dawg's little Beast.........consider the dachsund fans. Or, hevvin help us, Purse Dogs.
Definitely in the eye of the beholder. Besides, they were probably tasty with mole sauce.


esperanza

Oct 23, 2009, 10:02 AM

Post #12 of 31 (5831 views)

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Re: [PamelaDelafield] See You Later, Mr. Chan*

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In Reply To
If Mexicans think so highly of the Xoloitzcuintli, a hairless, crooked tooth altogether weird looking dog, why did they used to eat them? In you case, we need to add dog to the following Mencken quote.

We must respect the other fellow's religion, but only in the sense and to the extent that we respect his theory that his wife is beautiful and his children smart. H. L. Mencken

Quote

I actually have a recipe for Xolo, if anyone would like it.

And if you know any of these dogs, they are quite wonderful: cute, friendly, smart, and, of course, warm. The early indigenous in what later became Mexico used them as blankets and as meat. Like this puppy, it's quite common for them to have head, tail, and foot hair.


Xolo puppy, eight weeks old, Pátzcuaro, September 2009

http://www.mexicocooks.typepad.com









(This post was edited by esperanza on Oct 23, 2009, 10:50 AM)


arbon

Oct 23, 2009, 10:16 AM

Post #13 of 31 (5824 views)

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Re: [Gringal] See You Later, Mr. Chan*

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"The Lewis and Clark expedition, when it got way up north there in salmon country and snugged down with the local Indians, much preferred dog to salmon. No accounting for taste, eh? "

It does not take long to have had enough "Fresh" salmon, when it was not just a "Once a week" thing.

It gets to be like Zucchini, 101 recipes for salmon.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~



(This post was edited by arbon on Oct 23, 2009, 2:03 PM)


Hound Dog

Oct 23, 2009, 10:22 AM

Post #14 of 31 (5824 views)

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Re: [Gringal] See You Later, Mr. Chan*

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OK, Pamela and Gringal:

You´ve had your fun but since one of you brought up the notion of pets that can be consumed by their owners and have other positive characteristics besides simply worshipping and fawning over their masters, I must tell you that you have taken Dawg back to the 1950s and the new, at that time, transitor radio which young Dawg listened to at night in bed primarily tuned to WLAC in Nashville and XERF in Del Rio which featured Wolfman Jack in those days and Dawg will never forget Wolfman´s commercial:

"Now, all yáll have to do to get yo 500 baby chicks is send Wolfman a postal money order for $3.99 - yea that´s right folks, only $3.99 to Wolfman Jack c/o XERF in Del Rio, Texas and the Wolfman will send you 500 baby chicks and get this folks, they ain´t nothing cuter than a bunch of baby chicks runnin´round the house and whut´s great about baby chicks in when they is growed up and done got ugly and you gets tired of ém you can eat ém."

By the way, these were the days of the clear channel radio stations and XERF, while broadcasting from Del Rio actually had its tranmitter across the border in Mexico where, apparently, there were no controls on the power of the transmitter. The call letters indicate that XERF was actually a Mexican radio station and the fact that Dawg could pick up their signal in South Alabama and probably could have picked it up in Ouagadougou demonstrates the power of regulation.


(This post was edited by Hound Dog on Oct 23, 2009, 11:05 AM)


Axixic


Oct 23, 2009, 12:50 PM

Post #15 of 31 (5782 views)

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Re: [Hound Dog] See You Later, Mr. Chan*

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I remember Wolfman Jack but you weren't too cool for school if you weren't listening to Night Train. That Night Train R&B soul music would have gotten you thrown out of Bammie.

Does Esperanza have any barbecue Xolo recipes? Maybe you can have us over for some delicious Xolo.


Rolly


Oct 23, 2009, 1:10 PM

Post #16 of 31 (5773 views)

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Re: [PamelaDelafield] See You Later, Mr. Chan*

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I once set next to Wolfman Jack on a flight from LA to I-don't-remember-where.

I was surprised by two things -- how short he was and what high platform shoes he wore.

Now, back to México.

Rolly Pirate


wendy devlin

Oct 23, 2009, 2:41 PM

Post #17 of 31 (5737 views)

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Re: [esperanza] See You Later, Mr. Chan*

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While on this 'Xolo' theme. Esperanza's photo of the Xolo pup, is sporting a lot of hair.

Do the pups lose this hair, in maturity?

Haven't actually met a pure-bred Xolo but the Xolo's of my acquaintenance in the Colima, countryside are smooth skinned. And highly valued as both friend and culinary companion.

Historically speaking.

These days, relatives in Colima, are more interested in the cash, they can get from selling the puppies. In a somewhat? Puppy-mill, fashion.


Glenn

Oct 23, 2009, 2:45 PM

Post #18 of 31 (5732 views)

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Re: [Rolly] See You Later, Mr. Chan*

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Rolly
To us Texas boys years ago, Wolf Man Jack was Mexico.
Glen


tashby


Oct 23, 2009, 8:06 PM

Post #19 of 31 (5685 views)

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Re: [Hound Dog] See You Later, Mr. Chan*

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Charming.

If nobody objects too much I've had my fill of dog eating so I'm going to drag this one back on topic, Mr. Chan.

We're renting a place in Ajijic and evidently there's an alarm system that came with it. We've been in this rental for a year and are about to re-up. We've never engaged the alarm system, or even looked into it. (Previous renters unplugged it.....bla bla bla.)

Our set-up is much more "urban" than Hound Dog's, as in, we're wall-to-wall with neighbors, and there isn't much land/property. We keep nothing in the house of value (except, of course, a couple of computers and.....a plastic card or two).

There is easy access from a vacant lot next door. Just a scoot over a wall or two. Nothing we can do about that. Nonetheless...

If someone breaks into the house while we're here, we'll hear it. (Our response to that, for better or worse, is the same sort of feeble whether we hear breaking glass or an alarm.)

If we're not here when they break in.......eh? What good is an alarm system in that case?


TIO GREENGLEE


Oct 24, 2009, 6:01 AM

Post #20 of 31 (5651 views)

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Re: [tashby] See You Later, Mr. Chan*

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Two loud dogs, bright lights on motion detectors, outside cameras that have blinking red LED's but I can't use because they are wireless and on the same frequency as my wireless Infinitum modem, and rumors that I teach English to the PFP and Policia Estatal have all been very effective in preventing break-ins, vandalism and graffiti.


Hound Dog

Oct 24, 2009, 8:02 AM

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Re: [tashby] See You Later, Mr. Chan*

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If we're not here when they break in.......eh? What good is an alarm system in that case?

Well, Tashby, if I may attempt to be serious for a couple of moments, the alarm syatems we use in San Cristóbal and at Lakeside are both constantly monitored and if the alarms are tripped the alarm company monitor immediately calls the house and unless the responder knows a particular secret code word and after identifying themselves is able to convince the alarm company representative that the alarm was a false alarm, , they send an employee and the police to the residence immediately. Believe it or not that actually works or has so far. Now, let´s say The Dawg and Dawgette are 1500 kilometers distant at that other residence when a break-in attempt occurs and any house-sitter we have hired is not around. The property manager is called and has his own secret code and is obligated contractually to come to the residence along with the alarm company and police.

The alarm has one more efficacious value. That sumbitch makes a noise similar to the hounds of hell in full frontal attack and that´s the reason for my rather impolitic joke about Birmingham Brown outrunning Charie Chan´s car speeding down the highway after he spotted a ghost. When that alarm goes off, more sophisticated thieves know the police are not far behind and those less knowledgable are so freaked that they set a world record run from Chapala to Jocotepec in less than three minutes.


(This post was edited by Hound Dog on Oct 24, 2009, 11:28 AM)


Zorba

Oct 26, 2009, 1:29 PM

Post #22 of 31 (5479 views)

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Re: [Hound Dog] See You Later, Mr. Chan*

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Y'all just need a reputation. Have a couple of big nasty dogs and get yourself a shotgun. Take a stroll on your balcony or in front of a big window in your underwear with the wife beater on and the tats in full view. Sit down and clean your shotgun while sipping on some JD. Let out a random scream and a holler on occasion. Something like "Oh ya!" or "Booya!"

Then the first time some scumbag unlawfully steps on your property fire off a bunch of rounds over their heads. If the situation warrants it, go ahead and put some in his leg. They won't be back.


Peter


Oct 26, 2009, 4:49 PM

Post #23 of 31 (5446 views)

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Re: [Zorba] See You Later, Mr. Chan*

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Rapid-fire paintball guns are really neat! They sting a lot too, especially if ya get the paintballs from your freezer.


Axixic


Oct 27, 2009, 7:35 PM

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Re: [arbon] See You Later, Mr. Chan*

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Weren't the only dogs native to North America the Xolo and the Chihuahua? Where did the Indians find dogs unless Lewis and Clark brought dogs with them. What is your opinion about the Mountain Men who married in the Spring, ate their wives in the winter and married again come Spring?


arbon

Oct 27, 2009, 8:11 PM

Post #25 of 31 (5369 views)

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Re: [PamelaDelafield] See You Later, Mr. Chan*

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"Weren't the only dogs native to North America the Xolo and the Chihuahua? Where did the Indians find dogs unless Lewis and Clark brought dogs with them."...............
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The coyote and wolf are also canines.
~~~~~~~~~~~~

"What is your opinion about the Mountain Men who married in the Spring, ate their wives in the winter and married again come Spring?"
~~~~~~~~~~~

They had a taste for "Frigid Women"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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